I totally understand why moms always think their child isn't eating enough food. Of course I know that Cora is eating plenty and is totally healthy, but it is still the thought that comes to mind constantly as a mom...is my baby eating enough? And I can see that I will probably think that for the rest of my life.
I have successfully breastfed my baby for almost 7 months and I really am hoping to breastfeed at least until she is a year old. Most of my friends have done this and I kind of thought it would be no problem. Now, working full time and having Cora at day care 5 days a week, I'm not as sure it will work out how I imagined.
Cora has been in daycare for 4 weeks now and it has been a bit of a roller coaster. Every week is a bit different and I'm learning to just go with the flow. Ha! Welcome to parenthood. The first week she was eating more than I was pumping during the day and I panicked that my milk supply was decreasing and that I wouldn't be able to breastfeed her. Then the second week she was eating about the same amount as I was pumping and I was relieved and thought everything was okay.
The third week she was eating less than I was pumping and I panicked again that something was wrong. After talking to a lactation consultant and doing some experimenting we discovered that my frozen milk tastes bad and it even tastes bad after being in the fridge for two days. No wonder Cora doesn't want to eat the frozen milk I've been sending to daycare for her! I'm not sure if it is an excess lipase enzyme or if it is something else, but it hasn't appeared to hurt Cora at all. It just smells and tastes a bit sour/soapy/metallic/like spit up. The problem can be fixed by heating the freshly pumped milk on the stove before freezing. We tested a batch and the frozen milk was still sweet and Cora ate it!
Of course we discovered this problem right before I left on my first work trip for two days and we were counting on Cora eating frozen milk the whole time. Neil did a great job and improvised with the pumped milk I left from the couple days before and with formula. Okay, I give in and agree that having Cora drink formula isn't the end of the world if that's what we have to do.
So her fourth week in daycare she still ate less than I was pumping, but ate more with the formula addition and sweet milk. And she eats lots of her solid food during the day, so I'm sure she is getting plenty.
I did have a bit of a meltdown on Friday night trying to figure out what to do with the 50+ ounces of milk I pumped while I was on my trip. I worked so hard to pump every 2-3 hours (in the car, in the hotel, etc.), to store the milk in bags in a cooler with ice, and to clean all the pump accessories while on the road. Everything I had pumped on Tuesday tasted bad and I just threw it in the freezer, but the milk from Wednesday and Thursday I scalded on the stove and Neil helped to put it in bags to freeze. However, some of the milk still tasted funny after being scalded and I was so frustrated and tired that I just felt defeated by the milk. We just froze it anyways and will see if Cora eats it or not.
This week I'm planning to send her with scalded milk from Friday for Monday, then the rest of the week I'll send the milk I pumped the day before. We'll see how it goes!
Breastfeeding for a full time working mom with her baby in daycare is definitely not always easy.
Shoot, that sounds stressful. I'm sorry you're having to deal with that! But I'm sure, like most everything else in parenting, this too, is just a stage, and everything will work itself out. Even if that involves formula. But I agree, being a working parent is harder than it sounds - there's always something extra hard to balance, like sleeping enough, feeding your baby, making time for yourself, etc. You're doing a great job though! xoxo
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